Wednesday, January 19, 2005

Why it sucks to be Brad Pitt

Don't be an idiot. It can't suck to be Brad Pitt. The above pic is from a set of photo's that recently started doing the rounds - for the brain dead, they show Brad and Angelina Jolie (crikey Moses, she's a fucking demon from hell, sent to mess with my loins) getting all close and cuddly whilst filming their new movie, Mr and Mrs Smith, in Amalfi (Italy).

"“There really seemed to be a chemistry between them,” said one onlooker. Unfortunately for Jennifer Aniston, she wasn’t the woman on her husband’s arm — it was Angelina Jolie. Star has never-before-seen photos showing the movie stars as they tenderly touched in the small, quaint seaside resort town near Naples.

The pictures show the Mr. and Mrs. Smith co-stars getting increasingly cozy after the movie cameras stopped rolling on the film they were shooting. The pair, according to witnesses, took a stroll together along the picturesque streets of the village and were “always laughing and joking.”
" The Star

Angelina, however, is adamant that she has not been indulging in any kind of kinky sex with Brad - she has only done it missionary and doggie, and there was the one time that they did it over the back of a chez lounge, but that doesn't count because she took it up the shizzer. Angelina had this to say:

""I've been painted as the Wicked Witch of the West and a marriage wrecker," Jolie complained in an article yesterday on the IMDb.com Web site. "Half the world believes we had an affair and I'm the one to blame."

But that's simply not true, the Oscar-winning "Girl, Interrupted" star said.

"All I've ever been to Brad is a shoulder to cry on," she said. "The truth is, I was there to try to help him through his pain." " NYDN

I have a lot of pain. Mostly in my balls. I wish she'd help me through my pain. Sometimes it sucks to be The Salamai - only sometimes, mind you.

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