Thursday, December 23, 2004

Buy shares in Splattermail

Who knew!? And it seems that our friend at AquilaOnline has been buying stock. Cool, dude. Thanks! Didn't even know that we were listed, had authorised (let alone issued) share capital, or had engaged in any IPO's. And Splattermail's share value is growing!!! YEE-HA!!

You TOO can own shares in Splattermail (apparently). Don't know how it works, but check out BlogShare in any event. You'll have to scroll down to get Splattermail's details.

Merry Christmas, love the Hiltons

What a lovely looking family. Even Nicky's not such a bad seed. I wonder if Mr Hilton realises that most of the friends and relatives who will receive this Christmas card have probably got off watching his oldest daughter sucking some degenerate's cock? HOO-HA!! Now THERE'S a Christmas thought for you!!

I'm NEVER having daughters. I'd rather have one gay son to compensate.

Letters to Walken

Some weird Cornell arts dude came up with a project to get other dorm students to write their Christmas letters to Christopher Walken (...okay?). Imagine finding Christopher Walken chilling on your sofa eating mince pies and drinking a beer? I would shit myself instantly. Still, an interesting idea. And there are some interesting letters. Check it out.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004


Thanks, Toadie. I had a good laugh at this one.

Now, if you don't mind, I am going to go and die of tuberculosis. Well, I feel that way. Work sucks.

(Sorry if its a bit small. Deal with it - I did. And I'm talking about the newspaper clipping, FYI)

They've done it!

"The classic puzzle about whether an infinite number of monkeys typing for an infinite period of time would type a Shakespeare play has been answered in the affirmative.

Researchers at the Raleigh Institute near Manchester, England, announced that the monkeys in their lab produced a perfect version of "Romeo and Juliet."

"We've been holding our breath for weeks," says Alan Ripshaw, the researcher in charge of the Monkey Project. "We knew the monkeys were getting close, but we've had a number of false starts. "One time they got to the fourth act of Macbeth, before making a mistake. The monkeys also recently typed out a Thomas Pynchon novel, but that doesn't count."

Ripshaw assembled 5,000 monkeys and an equal number of typewriters. The monkeys were rewarded with bananas every time they filled up a page with letters. "Ninety-nine percent of it was nonsense," Ripshaw says. "But one of the monkeys put up a blog on the Internet, and it has a big following."

But a researcher checking says the monkeys made a mistake. "In one reference, they called 'Romeo,' 'Romero.'"

Says Ripshaw, "I guess it's back to the drawing board
." Weekly World News

WOW!! Monkeys type Shakespeare and George W. Bush Man of the Year for 2004 (see below). Is it April Fool's already? Or did they get the monkeys and George W mixed up? Sometimes I really dispair of the media. I mean, I bet the above story is actually bullshit.

Still, at least the fucking monkeys make me laugh in a good way.

Just a little festive "what-the-fuck"

"For sticking to his guns (literally and figuratively), for reshaping the rules of politics to fit his ten-gallon-hat leadership style and for persuading a majority of voters that he deserved to be in the White House for another four years, George W. Bush is TIME's 2004 Person of the Year" More

Yes. Again. What the fuck!!?? And there I always figured Time was a respectable publication. Maybe they were thinking of MAD? Granted, their justification for his nomination is kinda wishy-washy. Like giving a turd on your shoe an award for just fucking sticking there, despite your best efforts to scrape it off on the kerb.

I hope he has a rubbish Christmas, and that he gets a slap in the chops from Santa. That assumes, of course, he hasn't convinced himself that Santa has weapons of mass destruction in his sack or installed on his sleigh.

PS. Sorry about my absence - been working like a dog out of the office. I'm also sick and grumpy. This is the first window of opportunity I've had to do anything for a week!! And I could have spent it crapping...

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